Created by pizza
this tutorial this made for informational purposes only. any misuse of it is the readers full responsibility. by reading this disclaimer you certify that you have no legs, weigh under 500 pounds, and do not own a computer. if you do not agree to these terms your penis will be removed and a large gorilla will rape you within 3 [working] days.
if you have ever gone on AoL (America Online) and entered a Lobby, you have surely seen at least one notorious AoL hacker. warning: these hackers should be considered armed and dangerous, it is suggested that if you encounter one you leave the chat room immediately, and delete your aol account you may have thought to yourself “HOW DOES THIS DUDE HACK LIKE THAT? I WANT TO BE A HACKER LIKE HIM!” this tutorial is written to help you become a real AoL hacker, like them. it will teach you the ways of the hacker, and how to achieve a level of i33tness, that has been the goal of mankind to reach for years.
step one to becoming an AoL hacker
in order to accomplish step one of being an AoL hacker you need the following things:
- a computer
- a modem
- a phone line
- the AoL software (AoL2.5 is the i33test)
- an AoL account (preferably an account that you are paying for)
if you have all of these, you are set.
follow the installation directions that come with your modem (if its not already installed) and get it into working condition. once you have done this install the AoL software, it shouldn’t be a problem finding an AoL disk since every man, child, woman and baby has had one sent to them. if you still can’t find one, you can always call 1-800-4ONLINE, and have them send you the internet(America Online)!!! if you have AoL 3.0 that’s all good (but i hear that AoL can traze u if u r uzing it!) to install the AoL software simply follow the directions printed on the disk. once you have done this you are ready to hack. you need a credit card (you can steal one from your parents wallets, or ask one of your hacker friends for one). have the credit card ready. now what you want to do is go through all the little dialogs that aol gives you, and when you get to the one that says “The AoL Software has detected that you have a OC13 modem, is this information correct? ‘Yes’, ‘No'” you want to click “No”. note: when aol detects that your 2400 bps modem is really an ISDN modem, they are really right! your modem company is just trying to fool you into buying another modem from them! don’t listen to them tho, AoL’s software is always correct! when you click “No” a little dialog will pop up to setup your modem. you want to click the button that says “Edit Commands.” in that dialog you will find a text box that says “Setup Modem String.” in that box you will find something that looks like “AT&F131337SUP^M” what you want to do is change that text to this “AT&F131337SUPM0^M“. what you need to do is find the last ^ in the text, and put an “M0” before that. this hacker secret will make sure your modem doesn’t make any noise when you are connecting to aol, so if you are going online at 3 o’clock in the morning to get some porn, your parents wont know! ain’t that a great hacker trick? huh huh? yah i thought so. ok so now we have everything setup. hit “OK” until you get to the sign on screen. select “New Local” from the screen name list and hit “SIGN ON”. once you are connected select an access number that is local for you, and hit ok or whatever, and it will log you off, and automatically switch the screen name to “New User” for you (GOOD IDEA AOL! I GiVe jo0 MaD ProPz 4 DaT iDea!). once you’ve connected you will be prompted with a series of screens, asking you for personal information including your credit card, etc. the first one will be for some kind of certificate, if you are making a new account… just enter the thing they give you on the disk, or disk packaging and continue through all the little shits. once you have entered all the information and a valid credit card, you get to select a screen name. for starters you want to make sure your CAPS LOCK is on. it’s located on the left of side of your keyboard and says “Caps Lock”. press this key and a little light will start to glow on the upper right hand side of your keyboard. this makes you a Level 1 Hacker. you want to make a screen name like “USER” and when you hit “Continue” AoL will automatically give you a Level 1 Hacker screen name like “USER8962347”. when creating a level 1 hacker screen name you have a couple choices. you can create the traditional “USER” screen name, or one of the following:
- “SEXYGUY”
- “SEXY”
- “COOL”
- [your name]
- [your favorite band]
- [something significant to you]
make sure these things are typed-in IN ALL CAPS, CAPS MAKE YOU A HACKER. once you’ve created the screen name you want to select a password. a good password is something like your real name, or your screen name. so if your screen name is “USER218487” you should make your password “user” or something close to your screen name. when you create your screen name you are ready to hack on aol.
step two to becoming an AoL hacker
now that you have an AoL account, you can hack AoL. now you need to make yourself a name. a good way of starting is going into Lobbys (Control + K, keyword: Lobby) and talking shit to people, but you should never do this without a PRoG. a PRoG is a program written by a Level 5+ Hacker that accesses secret hacker databases allowing to hack aol’s mainframe with it.
this is a good web page to get hacker progs at:
select one of the many hacker PRoGs from this page, and use it in the lobby. one of the best hacking PRoGs i have ever seen is HaVoK. this PRoG has many features including a SCRoLLeR, a PuNTeR and a ToSeR. all of these are useful utilities for Level 1 Hackers. once you have downloaded a PRoG use the lobby entrance procedure. (Control + K, Keyword: Lobby)
when you are in the lobby find a feature on the prog under the “Chat” section, that will scroll a “macro”. a macro is a picture drawn in the chat room through normal letters like this…
now that you have a scroller you can scroll in the lobby. by scrolling in a lobby you upgrade your status to a Level 2 Hacker. now you should practice scrolling and using other features in the prog for at least a week and become well aquainted with the PRoG so if an emergency should arise, you will be ready to HACK.
when you are in a Lobby talking shit you should always have your CAPS LOCK key on and replace words with single letters
ea. Hello everyone. How are you guys doing today? Are any of you from California?
would be “HELLO EVERY1. HOW R U GUYS DOING 2DAY? R NE OF U FROM CALI?”
practice talking like this alot, so you can use it to impress the newbies
step three to becoming an AoL hacker
once you have practiced hacking with your PRoG, you are ready to join other real hackers. hackers hang out in private rooms like “Mm” and “SeRvEr”, another good hacker room is private room “FaTe” (good hackers only!) to access a private room you need to use the room buster feature on the PRoG. AoL does not let you go into private rooms UNLESS YOU HAVE A PROG! load up the room buster and type in “SeRvEr” in the box. notice how the letters are TyPeD iN aLtErNaTiNg CaPz. alternating caps are a very special way of typing that show others that you are a hacker. when you are in these rooms (SeRvEr, Mm, FaTe) it is very important that you type in ALL CAPS or aLt CaPz. to type a sentence in alternating caps you should do the following:
- think of the sentence in your head.
- convert this sentence to ebonics, or partial ebonics.
- have one of your fingers ready to press on the “Shift” key
- type the sentence, making sure to make all vowels lower case, and all consenants upper case. (press shift to make the letters upper case/lower case
note: talking like a Level 3 Hacker is a skill, that requires alot of practice. if at first you do not talk like a hacker keep practicing. for some people, talking like a hacker will be alot easier, such as gangstaz from da GHeTTo. the WaReZ (pronounced ware-z) language was originated from the GHeTTo and is naturally easier for descendants of the GHeTTo to speak, so do not be discouraged at first.
step four to becoming an AoL hacker
once you have established yourself in the WaReZ community you need a handle. a handle is a nickname by which your online friends call you. a good handle is usually something short that you can fit in a screen name (10 letters or shorter under aol’s current limit) or something that has an X, Z or V.
here are some sample handles:
- BioNiCxFeRReT
- eViLxMuFFiN
- DeMoNxGHoST
- DaRKxSouL
- FaTxGoRiLLa
- PHeaReDxDeaTH
- GHeTToXKiLz
- XxeLiTexX
your handle should be in WaReZ letters, and cause other hackers to fear you or respect you when they first encounter you. at this stage in your AoL hacker experience you should try to join some type of WaReZ group. WaReZ groups are clans of hackers that upload pirated software to other hackerz. when you join a WaReZ group there are many benefits like being able to talk shit and back it up by having many of your hacker friends PuNt/ToS the guy that fuckz with you. once you are in a group you have the right to call people LaMeRz. calling someone a LaMeR is the worst offense on aol. by calling someone LaMe you totally strip away their rights as a hacker, and make a joke of them in public. here are some methods if calling someone a LaMeR and backing them up
OnlineHost:
OnlineHost: *** You are in “SeRvEr46“. ***
OnlineHost:
XxHaCKx666: SuPz GuYz
XxLaMeFuQ: FUCK U XxHaCKx666
XxHaCKx666: HeY FuCK u BiTcH, DoNT FuCK WiF Me
XxLaMeFuQ: WHAT R U GONNA DO ABOUT IT PUNK?
XxHaCKx666: R u FRoNTiN FuQiN LaMeR? HuH? u R FuCKiNG LaMe u DuMB BiSH
XxLaMeFuQ: DUDE FUCK U. DAT WUZ UNCALLED 4. U R DA LAMER
XxHaCKx666: I DoNT ThiNK Zo BuDDy. GeT ReaDY To FeeL My WRaTH.
XxLaMeFuQ: HaHaHaHa FUCK U DUDE. YOU COULDN’T TOS MY SALAD. WAIT NEVERMIND.
XxHaCKx666 ims the head of security in his group and reports that XxLaMeFuQ is messing around with him. the head of security notifies other members of the group and selects the proper method of termination.
XxHaCKx666: LoL! DuDe u R Zo FuQeD
XxHaCKx666: ¤•¤ Area51 TOS By: BiG WorM ¤•¤
XxHaCKx666: ¤•¤ Hey XxLaMeFuQ, Bring me back a taco with cheese ¤•¤
XxLaMeFuQ: RoFL! ONE TOS WON’T KILL ME U LAME FUCKER
XxHaCKx666: ¤•¤ Area51 TOS Complete {S Q} ¤•¤
XxHaCKx666: ¤•¤ I hope you like greasy dingle berries! ¤•¤
XxHaCKx666: HaHa DewD. I GoT My GrewP 2 ToS u! LoL RoFL. SaY ByE ByE To DaT aCCouNt! 😉
XxLaMeFuQ: OH SHIT! FUCK U DUDE. UR DED!
XxHaCKx666: HaHaHa, No u R!
OnlineHost: XxLaMeFuQ has left the room.
XxHaCKx666: LoL RoFL
XxHaCKx666: ¤•¤ Area 51 TOS DeatH BoT By: BiG WorM ¤•¤
XxHaCKx666: ¤•¤ XxLaMeFuQ was terminated =] ¤•¤
as you can see from this example, having a good prog and being part of a warez group can help you win your online wars with class and style, and earn you respect from others. the toser used in this example was a high tech quality toser that was banned from aol because of its unorthadox methods of hacking. consider yourself lucky if you can find this toser and do not send it to anyone!
