RIP Monk-E-God aka Tom

Monk-E-God, one of the most prominent figures from the AOL add-on programming scene of the late 90′s, has died.

Initially someone emailed me about “Tom” dying and I had no idea who they were talking about. I’m really bad with names so I always feel a little bad when someone from that era emails me. However, I remembered the “moorpark” location they mentioned and a discussion about it at knk4life.com – and that’s when it hit me that they were talking about Monk-E-God. I remember talking with him at what I think was knk’s old forums (and possibly later GPX’s forums, though I can’t remember if he was a member of that forum) and checking out his work at knk’s website.

I wasn’t really close to the guy, but I remember him as being one of the best programmers from those days. He was one of those people who’s reputation preceded them, it’s really sad to hear he’s gone. Thinking about that era brings back a lot of memories. If it wasn’t for that community and those days on AOL, I wouldn’t have become the programmer I am today.

Source:  http://patorjk.com/blog/2010/02/15/monk-e-god/

Monk-E-God bas

http://darcfx.com/Files.aspx?dfid=355

Monk-E-God spy

http://darcfx.com/Files.aspx?dfid=702

Monk-E-God’s Tree House

http://web.archive.org/web/20000826223236/http://www.kraproom.com/monkegod/

Some of his AOL programs were epic cc crack, epic leet0 talker, epic color render marco ·º [beta³], intercept profile tagger¹·º beta², Scroll dat Sodomy, Monk-e-God’s Macro Converter, monk-e-fade³,

Article that goes with above photos
“No, absolutely no kraproom.com!”
posted by Tom (Monk-e-God) July 6, 2000 9:24 PM PDT

I’ve explained this many times but I’ll do it again. The Olsen twins were on the ship as part of this “Sail with the Stars” program. Apparently some crazy parents were willing to cough up something on the order of $500 to have their kids participate in activities with Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen. You would think that so few people would do that that it would actually be cool for the people that did … as in it would be such a small group that they would actually get to know the twins. The truth is, there were a whole lot of kids that did it … and the Olsen twins hardly participated in any activities. Most of the time the twins just stood and watched while the kids did weird dances led by a group of 4 (or so) large male dancers called, collectively, “Fantasy.” One of these guys was named “Echo” and he, apparently, had the super-hero-like ability to speak in this weird way where he echo-ed what he just said. It was actually kinda cool and sounded like a computer-effect. Once while in this dining area (I wouldn’t call it a cafeteria) we were talking to one of the other Fantasy members. His name was Todd. I asked him what his special power was (a reference to Echo having a special power). He didn’t tell me his and, instead, asked me what mine was. I explained that I possessed super-human strength and then I asked for a picture with him. He actually agreed and made sure to put his arm over my shoulder, what a cutie.

Ok, I’ll get back on track. On the first day of the cruise they had this private intro-party thing for the Sail with the Stars group. I tried to get in the front door by claiming I was part of the group but they asked my name (to check against the list of names of people who were in the group). I also tried claiming that I was “the star”. Luckily, on that first day at least, they didn’t have effective security and myself, my brother, and my cousin Ben snuck in the back to watch the intro thing. The official leader of all of the activities was some guy named “Big Mike” who, according to olsentwins.com, we “might know from MTV.” Apparently he is some sort of announcer guy who says all that stuff like “Coming up nexxxttttt — the Backstreet Boys and Britney Spears.” So, if you have the special version of MTV where you see the announcer, you’d know him. During the intro party “Big Mike” came out in some sort of dragon-mascot costume. He is also a professional mascot, no joke, and does stuff for the WNBA and some professional football team that I didn’t even know had a mascot. The Olsen twins brought a bunch of people with them, all of which were introduced at that party. They each brought their “best friend” … one was incredibly hot and the other was somewhat hot. The reason “best friend” is in quotes is because I don’t think they were their real friends. I never saw them talk. The Olsen twins also brought their brother, Trent, and their brother’s friend, Spencer. When Spencer was introduced they said he was on TRL … probably just requesting a video but throughout the entire cruise we referred to him as “the TRL guy.” They also brought some cousin of theirs (a lil girl) and their younger sister. Their sister’s name was “Lizzy” which sounds like a great name … for a cartoon lizard. Lizzy looked exactly like the twins. I had heard that the Olsen twins live in Ventura county and I asked Lizzy (because she was actually easily accessible) and she said something like “no, Idaho” err something … like little kids say when you’re right but they try feebly to trick you … so they might actually live very near me. More evidence of this is that the person you’re supposed to contact to set up a Sail with the Stars thing (their manager er something) is in Westlake.

My first actual encounter with the twins was when I asked if I could get my picture taken with them. This was on like the second day of the cruise and they, along with their whole entourage (bodyguard, two best friends, their brother and his friend), were leaving the theater. I walked up to them and just asked “can I get a picture with you?” They looked around for confirmation and their bodyguard, Scott, said something like “it’s up to you, girls.” They agreed to the picture and stood on either side of me. I, without them noticing, pulled out a small sign I had made on a half-piece of paper which said “kraproom.com” and my cousin took the picture. Sadly the picture didn’t turn out well, due to poor camera work ::sigh:: my sign was cut-off. Here is the picture.

After that picture was taken I stuck the sign in front of one of the twins and asked them to hold it for another picture. Both of the twins looked at it and confused-ly showed it to their bodyguard. Upon reading the sign the bodyguard exclaimed “NO, ABSOLUTELY NO KRAPROOM.COM” (hence the title of this post). They then claimed to be “in a hurry” and stormed off. At that time my cousin took this picture of me laughing as they walked away.

The next day as we were watching a fast and furious game of bingo from the balcony I saw Scott, the bodyguard, walk up to the desk on the lower level and buy a bingo card. I yelled “Hey!” and stuck my “kraproom.com” sign to the glass that served as a railing for the balcony. He looked up then looked back down … but he kept looking up again and tried to make it look like he wasn’t looking. Sorta funny. Since he never left the twins’ side we knew they were down there playing bingo. This being the case, we made a plan to allow ourselves to catch them by surprise and take a picture. I stood on the staircase which faces the elevators they would use to get back to their room after the bingo game was over. When they came out I tried to take a picture but the camera wasn’t wound-up (er whatever) so it didn’t work. I was sorta confused for a second then I realized what was wrong but it was too late, they were already in the elevator. I ran up the stairs just basically to catch up to my brother and cousins who had already ran away. When we reached the floor above the floor which the Olsen twins were staying on we saw that the elevator they went in was on their floor (the elevators have lil digital displays that say what floor they’re on). I went down a level and caught them just as they were walking out of the elevator and to their room. I held out my “kraproom.com” sign (so the camera could see it) and took a picture and boy did it turn out bad! Damn, you need natural sun light to get any sort of picture out of those damn Kodak disposable cameras. Here is the picture with the brightness and contrast raised so you can make out the twins. (** Note: Neither of these pics exist on archive.org)

Anyway, after I took that horrible picture, I ran up the stairs and their bodyguard actually chased me! I didn’t feel like trying to escape from him (because he’d catch me easily) so I stopped and turned toward him. He got really mad and took my “kraproom.com” sign and said “I’ll keep this as a souvenir.” He also threatened to take my film. When making my new “kraproom.com” sign I wrote a note on the back saying that I’ll take legal action for two counts of theft (in case he stole my second sign, which he didn’t).

Fun with Signs
The signs I’m referring to aren’t my “kraproom.com” signs. They’re the signs used by the Sail with the Stars people to indicate that an area of the ship was “reserved” for their private activities. These signs (there were lots) were either on metal boards with magnetic letters or boards with slots in them with letters with things sticking out the back (to go in the slots). The first time we changed a sign we changed it very slightly and without a lot of thought put into the change:

We thought this was so fun that we brainstormed for a while about all the funny things you could spell by rearranging “RESERVED FOR SAIL WITH THE STARS.” The first time we changed it (before we brainstormed … see above) the sign was easy to change. There was a lot of room between the sign and the group and the change was minor. When we changed a sign for the second time it was under different circumstances. The last sign was the magnetic type so the letters could be arranged more quickly because you didnt have to pull them out … only slide them along the board. The second time it was the “slot-type” of board. The sign was also in-doors and near the elevators so there were more people around. We decided it would be best to take the sign elsewhere, change it, then return it. So we did just that. We took it outside, changed it, and waited outside for a time when no one was around (on the inside) so we could return it. After we returned it we only got one picture of the returned sign because we were in such a rush to get out of there. We returned back to the sign a few minutes later and someone had scrambled it … they obviously found it to be offensive >;P … but I think it’s just funny – before changes, me holding the changed sign while outside, the sign after being returned (hard to read).

The next time I tried to change a sign I got caught. It was in the same place as it was when we changed it to “sail with the ass” (see above). I was trying to change it when some middle aged guy came up to me and said “Put that back the way it was.” He said it in that voice where people try to be intimidating by acting like they aren’t “losing their cool” … like that calm voice that startles you because you were expecting someone to scream at you. I wasn’t finished changing it so I continued until I was done, even though he had already caught me. I changed it to say “WE EAT HORSES” (keep in mind the limited possiblities with just the letters that were already there). Being it that there is nothing terribly offensive about “WE EAT HORSES” I said (to the old guy) “But isn’t that funny?” He responded “No it’s not. Are you part of our group? (referring to Sail with the Stars)” I said no and he asked me to “put it back the way it was” and he called over an Indonesian crew member (they were all Indonesian). He told the crew member to “make sure he puts it back the way it was.” I started to change it and the old guy walked away … but for some reason the Indonesian guy started fixing it (instead of supervising me) so I just walked away and he fixed it.

On the last day of the cruise we noticed this sign that said “RESERVED FOR Q&A SESSION.” There was no one around so we took it down and started thinking of stuff to change it to. After converting the R to a P by ripping off one of it’s “legs” this is what we made: my brother and cousin holding the sign.

We then put the sign at the entrance to the movie theater and went up to the “disco” thing. My other cousin was there and he wanted to see the sign so we went down and smuggled it up to the “disco.” While we were there he took a picture with it and the girl sitting next to him posed for the picture too, even though she didn’t know what the sign said. After she saw the sign she got mad … and she’s probably reading this right now. Hi. (*** Sadly, this picture doesn’t exist anymore